Manhood Plan Outline

Manhood Plan

1.     Stages of Manhood (Building yourself and your children for Christ - I used a construction theme for the different stages of manhood instead of Lewis' knighthood theme)

a.     Design Phase

                                                              i.      When:  Before your children are born or shortly after (but it is never too late to start even if you have adult children or grandchildren)

                                                            ii.      Keepsake:  Design your Family Crest.  When designing your family crest, add symbols to the design that stand for major principals and ideas you want to pass on to your children and grandchildren.

                                                          iii.      Come up with your manhood plan for your son(s).  Just like building a house, you need to have a site plan and good blueprints before construction can begin. This is where you develop your plan and gather the resources you need to build your children for Christ. 

b.     Foundation Phase

                                                              i.      When:  When children can start to understand and remember things.  Around 2 or 3 years old.

                                                            ii.      Keepsake:  Install symbols in to your home and everyday life.  Develop routines that incorporate God (read bible stories, daily devotional after dinner, eat dinner as  a family and pray before each meal, pray together before you go to bed, give daily blessings to children, hang up family crest, hang up childs framed baptismal certificate)

                                                          iii.      Ceremony:  Have a breaking ground “ceremony.”  Share your plan with other good men that will be a part of your son’s life (Grandfathers, Uncles, close friends).

c.      Framing Phase

                                                              i.      When: Puberty (Passage into Manhood, no longer a boy but not yet a man) – Start of middle school or at some point in middle school before or during the summer before High School. 

                                                            ii.      Keepsake: Study Bible/Pocket Knife (says be prepared)/compass (go in the right direction)

                                                          iii.      Ceremony (rite of passage): Go out to a nice restaurant

                                                           iv.      Foundation should have been laid as child was growing up, now time to really start building.

d.     Rough-In Phase

                                                              i.      When: Half way through High School

                                                            ii.      Keepsake:  Family Crest pendant on chain to where around neck

                                                          iii.      Ceremony: Hunting/Fishing Trip/Gun Range/Trap and Skeet?

                                                           iv.      Encourage your son to start adding habits and routines into your everyday life that will last the rest of your life.  The family crest pendant should act as a reminder of what a man believes and how a man behaves.

e.     Finishes Phase

                                                              i.      When: High School Graduation

                                                            ii.      Keepsake:  Engraved Shotgun?

                                                          iii.      Ceremony:  Weekend Hiking/Camping Trip

f.       Builder

                                                              i.      When: Marriage – Maybe at rehearsal dinner, recommit to manhood vows and stress importance of wedding vows and “A woman to love” responsibility.

                                                            ii.      Keepsake: Framed Picture of Family Crest

                                                          iii.      Ceremony: Give framed Family Crest picture at rehearsal dinner

                                                           iv.      Your children are now ready to build their own family and children for Christ

g.     Master Builder

                                                              i.      When you become a grandfather.  Help build your grandchildren for Christ

2.     Manhood Questions and Answers (Info from Raising a Modern Day Knight)

a.     What is a man?

                                                              i.      Manhood Principles  – A real man:

1.      Rejects Passivity – Adam (the first Adam) was passive in the Garden of Eden when he did not stop eve from eating the forbidden fruit, and then also eating it himself.  Speak up clearly with courage.  Stand up for what is right.  Speak truth with love.

2.      Accepts Responsibility – Spiritually and socially, do it enthusiastically, God loves a cheerful giver.  Do what you can do and let God do the rest. (See section “b” below)

3.      Leads Courageously – Aggressively leading with God’s truths

4.      Expects a Greater Reward – The anticipation of true Joy, being with God after this life (Hebrews 12:1-2).  A great Hope.  Think of yourself as a citizen of Heaven temporarily living on earth, not as a citizen of earth trying to get into heaven.

                                                            ii.      These four principles are the North Star of Manhood – Make sure they are all grounded in love.

b.     What are a man’s responsibilities?

                                                              i.      A Will to Obey (God’s Will )

1.      Fear God and keep His commandments, for God will bring every act to judgment, everything which is hidden, whether it is good or evil (Ecclesiastes 12: 13-14). 

2.      True satisfaction in life is directly proportionate to ones obedience to God.

                                                            ii.      A Work to Do (God/Family/Church/Community/Occupation)

1.      Work willingly at whatever you do, as though you were working for the Lord rather than for people (Colossians 3:23)

2.      Life is bigger than your occupation, don’t let it be your defining quality of who you are.  Work is not going to be fun (God said so when he threw Adam out of the Garden – by the sweat of your brow), but it will be easier if you do something you are good at (Ecclesiastes 2:22). 

3.      Learn your child’s inner design, their natural bend and help him to explore things they are naturally good at.

4.      Expose children to a lot of activities when they are young and focus on their natural gifts as they get older.

                                                          iii.      A Woman to Love (Your Wife)

1.      Prepare your son to succeed in marriage, you become one flesh

2.      Love your wife like Jesus loves His Church, He died for the Church– No one ever hated their own flesh

3.      Honor all women, especially those in distress

4.      Love/Lead/Honor the opposite sex, especially your wife

5.      It is your responsibility to care and provide for women

6.      You cannot be a good father without being a good husband

c.      What does a man believe? (See Family Crest)      

                                                              i.      The Word of God (Bible)

                                                            ii.      The Niceen Creed:     

I believe in one God, the Father almighty,

maker of heaven and earth,

of all things visible and invisible.

I believe in one Lord Jesus Christ,

the Only Begotten Son of God,

born of the Father before all ages.

God from God, Light from Light,

true God from true God,

begotten, not made, consubstantial

with the Father;

Through him all things were made.

For us men and for our salvation

he came down from heaven,

and by the Holy Spirit was incarnate

of the Virgin Mary,

and became man.

For our sake he was crucified

under Pontius Pilate,

he suffered death and was buried,

and rose again on the third day

in accordance with the Scriptures.

He ascended into heaven

and is seated at the right hand of the Father.

He will come again in glory

to judge the living and the dead

and his kingdom will have no end.

I believe in the Holy Spirit,

the Lord, the giver of life,

who proceeds from the Father and the Son,

who with the Father and the Son

 is adored and glorified,

who has spoken through the prophets.

I believe in one, holy, catholic,

and apostolic Church.

I confess one baptism for the forgiveness of sins

and I look forward to the resurrection

of the dead and the life of the world to come.

Amen.

d.      How does a man behave? (See Family Crest)

                                                              i.      Obeys God’s Will not his own and follows God’s commandments

                                                            ii.      Loves his wife and family

                                                          iii.      Meditates on the Word of God

                                                           iv.      Prays daily

                                                             v.      Manages his thoughts

                                                           vi.      Serves others – be a man of service

                                                         vii.      Lives a life that is based on principles and is not ruled by his passions or emotions

                                                       viii.      Rejects passivity

                                                           ix.      Accepts responsibility

                                                             x.      Leads courageously

                                                           xi.      Expects a greater reward – Rejoice and have Joy, this will help to lead others to Christ. 

                                                         xii.      Do all these things unselfishly, thankfully, humbly, and lovingly – all things grounded in Love

e.     What should a man try to achieve?

                                                              i.      A Transcendent Cause

1.      A mission that  lifts us beyond ourselves, a passion that stirs up self sacrifice

2.      Needs to be Heroic - Bravery (being scared and doing it anyway) & Sacrifice

a.      Jesus is truly heroic – “And He was saying to them all, if anyone wishes to come after Me, he must deny himself, and take up his cross daily and follow me.  For whoever wishes to save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for my sake, he is the one who will save it.” (Luke 9:23-24)

3.      Needs to be Timeless – Significant beyond the moment

a.      Jesus is timeless – (Hebrews 13:8)

4.      Needs to be Supremely Meaningful - Something beyond the self and above the self

a.      Jesus is supremely meaningful – (John 14:6) (John 8:12)

5.      A child/man needs a vision of life that integrates the end of life with the beginning. A vision of life that connects time (now) with eternity.  This is what gives you a satisfying life (Genesis 25:8). Never let death find you unprepared.